Hail Mary Time
Humor / Politics - With Election Day looming, many candidates must face facts: Their campaigns may not be going as well as expected and will need to consider drastic measures to be victorious in November.
Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum has tried to sleaze his way back to the top but still finds himself trailing state treasurer Bob Casey. If he can’t turn things around soon, he may have to make a pact with the devil -- if Karl Rove is available.
Republican and gambling maven Alan Schlesinger has not been able to break single digits in his Connecticut senate race with Ned Lamont and Joe Lieberman. If (or when) he loses, Schlesinger’s only option will be to ask Lamont and Joe Lieberman to go double or nothing.
Grace Ross, the Green-Rainbow Party candidate for governor in Massachusetts, is currently battling Other and Undecided for fourth place. A Druid campaign ceremony with a two-drink minimum might help her give Undecided a run for its money.
John Spencer, the former mayor of Yonkers, is running neck-and-toes with Senator Hillary Clinton. Conventional wisdom says he doesn’t have a chance, but it’s not over until the fat lady sings -- or if the fat lady tells Page Six about her fling with Bill Clinton.
This also may not be the year for porn star Mary Carey to unseat Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. Her over-the-top sexual teasing hasn’t worked for Barbara Milkowski and it won’t work for Carey. If, however, she can demonstrate a bare minimum of intelligence, she could lay the groundwork for a 2008 presidential run.
