They Do Write Them Like They Used To
Humor / Music - No one knows what Adam and Eve’s tastes were when it came to music, but they were probably the first of continuous generations to proclaim, “They don’t play tunes like they used to.” Rap and most contemporary music created in the past 25 years aside, “they” will always play tunes like they used to -- sometimes even better.
As proof, consider “Moments to Remember,” a minor hit in the fifties by the Four Lads. It was written by the team of songwriter Robert Allen and lyricist Al Stillman. They were no slouches, having composed numerous hits like “Home for the Holidays,” “It's Not for Me to Say," and "Chances Are.”
But the second line of “Moments to Remember” displays a darker side of Stillman that he should have carried to his grave.
The New Year's Eve we did the town
The day we tore the goal post down
We'll have these moments to remember
Tore the goal post down? That’s pretty violent stuff, particularly coming from the team that wrote “Candy Bar Boogie” and “How D'ya Do Do Do.”
It also makes you wonder what other dark thoughts came to Stillman before settling on “The day we tore the goal post down.” Perhaps:
The New Year's Eve we did the town
The night dad wore a low-cut gown
We'll have these moments to remember
Or maybe:
The New Year's Eve we did the town
The night we ran the sheriff down
We'll have these moments to remember
Or, God forbid, even:
The New Year's Eve we did the town
The day we molested a circus clown
We'll have these moments to remember
We will never know how such a vicious image found its way into this innocent tune, but you have to question Allen and Stillman’s judgment. Even on their worst days, George and Ira Gershwin would’ve had the good sense to go with “I got rhythm” instead of “I got to tear the goal post down.”
Do you still believe they don’t write them like they used to? The next time a noise emanating from your radio causes you to look back wistfully to an era when every song touched you in a profound way, close your eyes and imagine: a hysterical stadium crowd charging onto a football field and destroying a perfectly good goal post.
