Micromanaging Mitt
Humor / Politics - Presidential candidate Mitt Romney and his advisers created a 77-slide PowerPoint presentation identifying potential problems for his campaign and possible remedies. Here are some additional recommendations.
Never punish people by making them sit through a 77-page PowerPoint presentation.
Emphasize that his polygamist great-grandfather had sought help for his sexual addiction at Promises Malibu Treatment Center.
Beef up his foreign policy resume by including the week he spent at Club Med - Brigham Young.
Utilize his spouse. Example: Stepford Wives for Mitt.
Point out that his hair, though too perfect-looking, can stop a bullet at point blank range.
Only change his views on abortion and homosexuality on odd or even days.
Demonstrate his strong position against illegal immigrants by disarming a landscaper of his leaf blower.
Emphasize his new-found aversion to all things French by encouraging women to buy only liberty cut underwear.
Don’t let people from his distant past come back to haunt him – like the citizens of Massachusetts.
Cancel his “Dancing with the Stars” appearance with Susan Sarandon.
